


The Official Spider-Man Fan Club

by liketolaugh



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Gen, POV Outsider, Social Media
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-31
Updated: 2017-08-20
Packaged: 2018-12-09 04:38:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11661780
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/liketolaugh/pseuds/liketolaugh
Summary: Since Tony Stark's public claim on the Iron Man name, social media has latched onto and tracked every new, known, and possible superhero. Including, of course, Spider-Man.





	1. Chapter 1

**Guy in pajamas stops a bus!!**  -  10,731 views (623 likes/107 dislikes)

Real Life Action [subscribed]

Published on Dec 27, 2015

* * *

COMMENTS – 319

**sentientfedora**

Oh great, yet another wannabe

               **ouch oof my bones**

               oh so i assume you can stop a bus with your bare hands too

**pepesbestpal**

               yeah this guy seems kinda legit?? no faking those effects bro

               **sentientfedora**

               look at him!! What is that, a sweatshirt and sweatpants sewn together?

               **lalaland**

               Some people aren’t billionaires, y’know

               [see 13 more]

**YODELEHEEHOO**

Gotta admit, bad taste in clothes aside, that’s some pretty impressive strength.

               **fmlfma**

               it won’t last. they never do

               **brobruhbrah**

               Yeah, half these guys prancing around in costume get bored after like a week

               **brobruhbrah**

               it’s like they think it’s gonna be easy or something

               [see 7 more]

**Evil Underlord Bob**

suddenly I understand why half of them go for spandex. jesus that’s ugly

               **James F.**

               Will you people get over the mfing costume already

               **theycallmefrank**

               Can’t argue with the truth, dude.

* * *

* * *

**_r/superheroes_ **

**This guy’s been seen every day for like a month…**

Submitted January 2016 by Mr Spandex Dude

I think this one might be sticking around, guys. Known powers are super strength (stopping a bus is the most impressive thing he’s done so far) and the ability to climb walls. He also started shooting something like webbing very recently, but that might not be natural. Here are some pics:

[picture]

[picture]

[picture]

* * *

all 37 comments

**hellolovely**

Not bad for a new guy, I guess.

               **tugowar**

               Except for the part where he hardly ever does anything interesting and instead spends his time with, like, bicycle thieves and helping old ladies cross the street.

                              **wilfredwarfstache**

                              Right? Like, he’s a good person and all, but he can do those thing without, you know, wearing an ugly costume.

                              **gangrenoussavage**

                              He does stop car crashes and stuff too. Costume might be for the best.

                                             **urexcellency**

                                             Yeah, I wouldn’t trust the government with a puppy if it had special abilities. They’re on a witch hunt.

                                             [3 replies]

                              **safesaneandsweet**

                              Oh, I’m sure you do that stuff all the time, high-and-mighty.

**braindrainjane**

Everyone wants to be a superhero. You know they haven’t gotten him to talk yet? Who the hell does this sort of thing and is _camera-shy?_

**AndYouMyDear**

Captain America hates cameras too. It happens.

                              **EverheartMonthly**

                              Captain America is like, the epitome of all that is good though. You know, ‘some men are born great, some have greatness thrust upon them’ yadda yadda. Humbleness probably comes with the package or something.

                              **braindrainjane**

                              He didn’t think this through, is all I’m saying.

                                             **AndYouMyDear**

                                             He has a mask. I think he thought it through just fine.

* * *

* * *

**Lawrence** @dunebug – Feb 17

This fucking spider-man came and webbed me to my car? And then apologized and said it would dissolve in two hours? Dude

* * *

* * *

**MrMagician** @magicismine – Mar 5

I got lost but this guy #spiderman came and helped me?? I’m so confused

* * *

 **Polly Wants A Cracker** @parrotnames – Mar 5

Usually I’m suspicious of masks at best but #spiderman saved my cat from a tree, so

* * *

 **Look Up Dude** @gullibleiswrittenthere – Mar 7

I’d like to see Tony Stark lead a little girl back to her parents. #spiderman

* * *

 **BegginYourPardon** @yoloman – Mar 8

There are webs all over my yard, oh my god what happened #spiderman

* * *

 **Mountain Bike Mania** @antiquebikes – Mar 10

I can’t get my bike to move, thanks #spiderman

* * *

 **The Little Guy** @nomorebullies – Mar 10

Sorry #spiderman but Captain America was the pinnacle of human goodness first

* * *

 **Mr Nice Guy** @sentientfedora – Mar 12

I can’t take #spiderman seriously while he wears that outfit, let’s be real, he ain’t shit

* * *

 **Rain on my Parade** @fairweatherfriend – Mar 14

Are small-time heroes a thing now? God #spiderman

* * *

 **WhoGoesThere** @mynameis – Mar 21

#spiderman is a little kid trying to be a policeman… and failing

* * *

* * *

**The Official Spider-Man Fan Club**

[Liked] [Following] [Share]

Posts

* * *

 **The Official Spider-Man Fan Club** _March 28 2016_

Look at Spidey go!!

[Spider-Man Car Crash Compilation]

(View all 6 comments)

* * *

 **The Official Spider-Man Fan Club** _March 23 2016_

Spidey no

[Spider-Man Webbed Someone To An ATM Again]

(View all 4 comments)

* * *

 **The Official Spider-Man Fan Club** _March 19 2016_

Fightin the real fight Spidey

[Lost? Just Find Spider-Man]

(View all 7 comments)

* * *

* * *

**Spider-Man Lets A Kitten Crawl All Over Him** – 23,426 views (926 likes/118 dislikes)

Heroes Being People [subscribed]

Published on March 25, 2016

* * *

COMMENTS – 476

**lalaland**

Oh my god you can hear him giggling

               **madeyoulook**

               the kitten’s name is _oreo,_ how sickeningly cute can you get

               **pewpewkachoo**

               Look at it sitting on his head omg

               **duckduckgoose**

               This guy can lift a minivan with one hand

               [see 4 more]

**sentientfedora**

well he makes a crappy hero but he’d make a pretty good girl scout

               **jajabang**

               You can’t seriously be finding fault in him rescuing kittens??

               **sentientfedora**

               I’m just saying, he’s a great person but he’s not a fucking superhero. Calm down

               **jajabang**

               Anyone who’s this committed to doing good is a hero, fucking fight me

               [see 8 more]

* * *

* * *

**Jenny B Jane**

@dontsuemeimpoor

I’m so lost oh god

8:03 AM – 02 April 2016

* * *

 **Jenny B Jane** @dontsuemeimpoor

replying to @dontsuemeimpoor

Like thirty seconds after I posted that #spiderman found me and?? I guess I know where I’m going now? Thanks Spidey

* * *

 **Jenny B Jane** @dontsuemeimpoor

replying to @dontsuemeimpoor

I can see #spiderman on the roofs, is he following me to work?

* * *

 **Jenny B Jane** @dontsuemeimpoor

replying to @dontsuemeimpoor

he thinks he’s being sneaky but, um #spiderman I can see you

[picture]

* * *

 **Jenny B Jane** @dontsuemeimpoor

replying to @dontsuemeimpoor

It turns out that it’s good that #spiderman was following me because someone stole my purse and now they’re stuck to the ground

* * *

 **Jenny B Jane** @dontsuemeimpoor

replying to @dontsuemeimpoor

This is not a good first day guys, and I’m not even at work yet

* * *

 **Jenny B Jane** @dontsuemeimpoor

replying to @dontsuemeimpoor

Thanks for your concern, y’all, I’m at work now and I waved to #spiderman when he ran off

* * *

 **Jenny B Jane** @dontsuemeimpoor

replying to @dontsuemeimpoor

Did that really just happen

* * *

* * *

Daniel McEverett > The Official Spider-Man Fan Club

April 13, 2016 at 4:06pm

This is a parody page, right?

               **The Official Spider-Man Fan Club** Not at all! I mean, we’re a small page, but Spidey’s earned it!

               **Daniel McEverett** Dude, Spiderman’s a boy scout at best and a vigilante at worst. What are you, twelve?

               **Daniel McEverett** This has to be a joke. I refuse to believe otherwise.

               **Marie Martinez** Hey man, if you’re not a Spidey fan than you can just, y’know, leave

               **Daniel McEverett** Are you actually defending this? I’m laughing so hard right now.

               **Daniel McEverett** Go play with your baby hero toys I guess.

               **Jason Field** Mod, you might wanna start making rules… Don’t want guys like this around

               **The Official Spider-Man Fan Club** Yeah, I’ll get right on that…

* * *

* * *

**Spider-Man fighting with the Avengers???** – 2,436,528 views (42,783 likes/1,369 dislikes)

Real Life Action [subscribed]

Published on May 11th, 2016

* * *

COMMENTS – 698

**lmaooooo**

Is that… is that really goddamn Spiderman? Saver of kittens and puppies and lost children?

               **Hoo daddy boy**

               In that outfit? No way

               **By Your Leave**

               Oh, who else do you know that’s spider-themed, uses webs, and is strong enough to hold up a fucking semi?

               **lolyandere**

               He’s on Iron Man’s side. Maybe he made the new outfit?

               **Michael Michaelson**

               Iron Man isn’t a fucking tailor. He uses metal not cloth

               **D’Arvit**

               Dude, do you know Tony Stark at all? Limits are for other people

               [see 9 more]

**Doug Dimmadome of the Dimmsdale Dimmadome**

Soo… I guess Spider-Man’s been holding out on us, huh

               **Damn You To Heck**

               God, who knew a scrawny thing like him could hold his own against Captain goddamn America

               **sentientfedora**

               Captain America was holding back, be real

               **KillerPecsBro**

               it’s still pretty fucking impressive. and I bet the Winter Soldier wasn’t holding back when Spidey caught that punch

               **BroDude**

               There’s that web stuff too. Guess it can hold more than common robbers

               [see 17 more]

**greatscott**

And this is the guy who spends his time giving directions and saving puppies

               **lalaland**

               And stopping car crashes, thieves, falling children, regular boy scout stuff

               **greatscott**

               Yeah, yeah, I’m sure there’ll be ‘I told you so’s enough for everyone. Don’t pretend y’all knew he was Avenger-level

               **Angel Puff**

               No. No one did

               [see 11 more]

**ChooChooTrain**

This is some super crappy footage

               **Waaalllooow**

               It’s from airport security cameras, give ‘em a break. They didn’t exactly bring professional camera operators.

               **Vroomvroom**

               kinda surprised there’s anything at all. someone must’ve put effort into it

               **MallowMarsh**

               well, yeah, Captain America and Iron Man fight it out and you think we’re not gonna want to know how it went? Please

* * *

* * *

**Tony Stark** @iron_pectorals

1:17 AM – 28 May 2016

Yes, that is NYC’s own Spider-Man in the leaked footage of the airport battle. And yes, I made the new suit, the old one was making me cry. It was made of cotton, guys. Cotton.


	2. Chapter 2

**_r/superheroes_ **

**Let’s Talk About the Accords**

Submitted June 3 2016 by A New World Order

For those of you who don’t know, the Accords are a legal document, ratified by 117 countries, placing restrictions on enhanced people and particularly the Avengers. The ratification ultimately ended in the breakup of the Avengers but that didn’t actually stop them from being implemented.

You can read them here, and there’s a handy article on the immediate aftermath of their implementation here.

This is a place to discuss the implications for different heroes and, of course, for us as well. Go!

* * *

all 352 comments

**sentientfedora**

Tony fucking Stark fucked things up again. Captain America had the right idea, bailing on it.

               [52 replies]

**fishesarewishes**

Captain America, Hawkeye, Falcon, Ant-Man, and the Scarlet Witch are all in hiding. What’s this gonna mean for them when they get back?

               [26 replies]

**Jailbird**

so what does this mean for Stark? does he have to register everything he builds or just his activity in the suit? and there’s something about AIs in there. doesn’t he have several?

               [17 replies]

**technophobia**

Does Vision count as an AI under the Accords?

               [14 replies]

**j-j-jar-jar**

I guess the Black Widow didn’t have any secrets left to keep anyway

               [12 replies]

**devilstrap**

Daredevil has so few confirmed sightings he’s practically a myth. This is gonna put a cramp in his style, huh?

               [9 replies]

**extralakazam**

I’m worried for Spider-Man. This is way bigger than the sort of stuff he normally deals with. I mean, does it even apply?

               **dondondont**

               I think it’d have to, wouldn’t it, at least now? There’s no coming back from his conflict with the Avengers, not really. People aren’t gonna just forget.

               **marypoppers**

               Spider-Man isn’t known for his property damage, so maybe not

                              **nancydrew**

                              Okay but with strength like his how long’s that gonna last

               **hailthelord**

               If he stopped webbing people up, probably. But like, that’s not going to happen

                              **voraciousvideos**

                              he seems really determined to keep his secret identity though

                              **Helloboys**

                              He could just keep being an illegal vigilante. Quake has.

                              **giantressa**

                              It says ‘national and international conflict’. Maybe if he keeps to muggers and thieves???

                                             **idfklol**

                                             Will he, though?

* * *

* * *

**The Official Spider-Man Fan Club**

_June 28, 2016_ – Pinned

So things around here have gotten a lot busier over the past month, and our resident spider has gotten a lot more popular. In light of that, we have two new mods managing the page – say hi to Mod Widow and Mod Huntsman! I’m also finally giving in and keeping things in order here, which means rules.

Ground rules! I know most pages don’t post them outright, but I thought it’d be helpful here.

  1. No threats! Not to Spidey and not to other members/commenters. We can be better than that, can’t we?
  2. We’re not organized enough for a three-strikes policy, but anyone caught repeatedly causing trouble will be banned. Keep your arguments civil.
  3. You won’t get banned for it, but please don’t openly speculate on Spider-Man’s identity and/or current location. It’s very rude.
  4. It’s Spider-Man, not Spiderman, damn it! (- Mod Huntsman)



We also have a Discord chat! discord.gg/sPjrl

\- Mod Orb-Weaver

(Like) (Comment) (Share)

(Like)/(Wow)/(Angry) 1.3K others

_256 Comments_

* * *

* * *

**Spider-Man stops a convenience store robbery AGAIN** – 71,872 views (1,812 likes/209 dislikes)

Real Life Action [subscribed]

Published on July 2, 2016

* * *

COMMENTS – 298

**Taken For Granted**

Has he ever had a day of training in his life or

**Dark Side’s Cookies**

               right? you can tell he has super strength cause that’s ALL HE USES

**menacles**

               Black belt over here, and I might actually be dying. He doesn’t even know how to throw a punch.

**lalaland**

               He’s trying his best…?

**sentientfedora**

               ‘Trying his best’ is not gonna stop him from getting shot.

**dontsueme**

               It’s confirmed that he has a healing factor, though, so it could be worse.

**Dark Side’s Cookies**

               and it will, I’m sure. eventually

               [see 4 more]

**brosbebroin**

Unbelievable, he went right back to the small stuff.

               **helloladies**

               I mean, it’s not like alien invasions are a daily thing.

               **brosbebroin**

               The Avengers usually manage to find stuff

               **helloladies**

               The Avengers are currently all hiding away to lick their wounds.

               **gogogreat**

               spidey hasnt changed just cause he has a new costume

               [see 5 more]

**YaintNothing**

He’s kept the new costume. It makes him look a lot more believable tbh.

               **AsYouWish**

               he’s like, a card-carrying superhero now

               **mostlydead**

               He might actually be a card-carrying superhero. Who knows with them?

               **vigilaint**

               It’s almost professional

               [see 3 more]

* * *

* * *

**Dude, Where’s My Kid?**

@luckorskill

Okay all, gather ‘round, it’s storytime. Because I just had the weirdest day

9:12 PM – 19 August 2016

* * *

 **Dude, Where’s My Kid?** @luckorskill

replying to @luckorskill

I take my kid to the park, because hey, it’s a nice day, plenty of sunshine, maybe he’ll make some friends, right? Right.

* * *

 **Dude, Where’s My Kid?** @luckorskill

replying to @luckorskill

And he did, hell, it was a good day. Played with at least three other kids. Except then he disappeared.

* * *

 **Dude, Where’s My Kid?** @luckorskill

replying to @luckorskill

I panicked, ofc. Bit of a crowd, obvs, but I started calling out, hoping he’d find his way back.

* * *

 **Dude, Where’s My Kid?** @luckorskill

replying to @luckorskill

Y’all remember my kid, right? This cutie here, takes after his daddy. He’s six.

[picture]

* * *

 **Dude, Where’s My Kid?** @luckorskill

replying to @luckorskill

He found his way back, ‘cept he wasn’t alone. I said it at the time, but thank you #spiderman for literally carrying my boy back

[picture]

* * *

 **Dude, Where’s My Kid?** @luckorskill

replying to @luckorskill

I was pretty relieved, ofc, but I didn’t really feel right just taking off? Felt ungrateful or smth

* * *

 **Dude, Where’s My Kid?** @luckorskill

replying to @luckorskill

Did y’all know that #spiderman is like, twelve?

* * *

 **Dude, Where’s My Kid?** @luckorskill

replying to @luckorskill

I’m kidding, he’s not twelve. But he’s damned young. Has a young voice. He seemed embarrassed when I brought it up tho

* * *

 **Dude, Where’s My Kid?** @luckorskill

replying to @luckorskill

Sweet, too, no surprise there. He was talking to my boy about Legos and Star Wars when they showed up. It was surreal, guys.

* * *

 **Dude, Where’s My Kid?** @luckorskill

replying to @luckorskill

Anyway, obviously we talked. I bought him ice cream, bc wtf else am I gonna repay him with? He seemed to like it.

* * *

 **Dude, Where’s My Kid?** @luckorskill

replying to @luckorskill

He was super talkative for a costume, too. Apparently he likes science and superhero statistics, because of course he does.

* * *

 **Dude, Where’s My Kid?** @luckorskill

replying to @luckorskill

I gotta say it again. He’s young. I’m getting the heebie-jeebies thinking about him fighting. Wtf

* * *

 **Dude, Where’s My Kid?** @luckorskill

replying to @luckorskill

We talked for like half an hour, and the whole time I couldn’t see how this kid could be a vigilante. Right up to the end.

* * *

 **Dude, Where’s My Kid?** @luckorskill

replying to @luckorskill

I asked him about his family. Regular small talk stuff, didn’t think much of it – I’d almost forgotten about the mask by then, tbh.

* * *

 **Dude, Where’s My Kid?** @luckorskill

replying to @luckorskill

But the kid just, stiffens up. And then he apologized, said he didn’t want to talk about it, ‘cause it might get back to his family.

* * *

 **Dude, Where’s My Kid?** @luckorskill

replying to @luckorskill

He said he didn’t want his family to get hurt ‘cause of what he does. Fucked up, right?

* * *

 **Dude, Where’s My Kid?** @luckorskill

replying to @luckorskill

I can’t really put everything we said here, but the point is, he’s a good kid? In over his head, maybe, but we knew that.

* * *

 **Dude, Where’s My Kid?** @luckorskill

replying to @luckorskill

Hope things work out for him in the end. Me and my boy, we’re rooting for him. Thanks again, #spiderman

* * *

* * *

**Tony Stark**

@iron_pectorals

Why are you all so curious about Spider-Man? And dammit, who told everyone and their dead brother that I was in charge of him?

2:04 AM – August 24, 2016

* * *

 **Tony Stark** @iron_pectorals

replying to @iron_pectorals

If I answer a few random questions here, will you all stop bothering Pepper? She’s blaming me for all this.

* * *

 **Tony Stark** @iron_pectorals

replying to @iron_pectorals

First. Spider-Man’s identity is not going to be disclosed under any circumstances, sorry not sorry, kindly fuck off.

* * *

 **Tony Stark** @iron_pectorals

replying to @iron_pectorals

As far as the Accords are concerned, Spider-Man is operating under my supervision, he’s cleared for light duty. Good for him.

* * *

 **Tony Stark** @iron_pectorals

replying to @iron_pectorals

And yes, he can bench press a semi, probably without breaking a sweat, and has a healing factor better than Cap’s. I am green with envy.

* * *

 **Tony Stark** @iron_pectorals

replying to @iron_pectorals

God, I hate making official announcements. Why do you people make me do this?

* * *

* * *

**Spider-Man calms a crying child** – 43,673 views (893 likes/108 dislikes)

Everyday Heroism [subscribed]

Published on September 2, 2016

* * *

COMMENTS – 289

**Uberly**

He’s weirdly good at that

               **winnerwinnerchickendinner**

               Well, he does it a lot, right? Finding lost kids is one of his ‘things’

               **winnerwinnerchickendinner**

               Speaking of which is anyone actually keeping track of all the things he does or what

               **poorlyaimed**

               he talks an awful lot too, shame the camera was out of range

               **Jewel Cut**

               I heard he’s really young! Maybe that’s why

               **brrrrrains**

               Nah, that’s dumb. No one doing the vigilante thing can be under twenty. It’s a rule or something

               **poorlyaimed**

               seconded

               [see 6 more]

**A Version of Fine**

Is he really safe to have around children, though…?

               **ResoNation**

               Did you actually watch the fucking video

               **dandelioness**

               No, they’ve got a point. He can bend metal, you know? It’s the principle of the matter

               **ResoNation**

               He won’t touch them. Hasn’t he proven that much?

               **gentrify**

               nothing’s enough huh

               [see 4 more]

* * *

* * *

 

**superhero-t-shirt**

**Your Fave is Problematic: Spider-Man**

  1. Is probably the youngest vigilante in NYC, seriously, everyone who’s met him mentions it
  2. Patrols while injured – we can see you limping, Spidey
  3. Accidentally webs the wrong person like twice a week
  4. Leaves notes? All the time? How has no one done a handwriting analysis yet
  5. Leaves webbing absolutely everywhere. Doesn’t matter if it dissolves, I’m p sure it’s still littering
  6. Used to patrol in literal cotton? Boi
  7. Switches randomly between rescuing kittens from trees, and stopping armed assault. It’s giving me whiplash
  8. Super gentle. I’m not sure any of his enemies even need to go to the hospital
  9. Sometimes crushes the cars he’s trying to stop from crashing. Oops
  10. Is in way over his head, let’s all be real honest here



**i-heart-nyc**

He’s definitely a far cry from Daredevil or Jessica Jones, that’s for sure

**monologue-my-ass**

  1. Is doing a pretty good job of pretending he never went to Germany or met the Avengers
  2. Has he touched an actual weapon ever?



**fuck-me-spidey**

Is someone going to bring up the secret identity thing? Because that’s actually pretty unusual. What’s he afraid of?

**1-800-superhero**

Consequences, probably

_24,082 notes_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually managed to forget that I needed to pass an entire year before we got to Homecoming. So, oops? *laugh* And of course, this chapter might get edited a little in the event that we find out more about Peter's role in the Accords.

**Author's Note:**

> Guys, the formatting on this was hell. It really was. If any of y'all have any suggestions for improvement, I'm open. Meanwhile, I've only got one more chapter planned for now, because I want to stay parallel to canon. See you around!
> 
> Personal tumblr - liketolaugh-misc  
> Writing tumblr - liketolaugh-dgm


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